Empty's Theme Park

librariansoul:

stayinbedgrowyourhair:

bricksandmortarandchewinggum:

newyorker:

The worst way to settle a tie in sports: devise some ridiculous theatrical spectacle which has only a small bit to do with the actual game. (For example: a soccer shoot out.)

The best way: create the purest and clearest form of competition in the sport. (For example: two women who tied in the 100m, racing again, alone, on the track.)

Nick Thompson asks, “Will track show soccer how to break a tie?” http://nyr.kr/MjRYwV

I love this story. It’s so rare the trials produce dramatic moments like this. 

“Soccer’s solution is pathetic and unworthy of the sport. Players pass, run, head, dodge, sprint off balance, and dive for a hundred and twenty minutes. If the game is still tied, they try to kick the ball in from twelve yards away. The best you can say is that the skill required to win is not entirely irrelevant. It’s like settling a basketball game with a game of H.O.R.S.E., and it’s only a touch better than resolving the Tour de France by seeing who can change a flat tire faster.”

oh this is so annoying. the players are given TWO HOURS to score a winning goal. if they can’t make it happen, would the author of this article rather they just restarted and began a new game? or replayed the game the next day? let’s imagine a team that ties every single one of their games in a competition and is forced to play each of those games a second time. if they somehow make it to the final match of the tournament, it would be theoretically possible for the team to have played TWICE the amount of soccer as their opponents. with a lot of major tournaments lasting only a matter of weeks, what are they odds that team will still have eleven players who are physically recovered enough to make it a fair fight?

i mean, jesus. the results of a shootout can seem unfair, but i have yet to see anyone suggest a realistic, viable alternative. games HAVE to end, tournaments HAVE to progress. “pathetic and unworthy of the sport”? geez.

I think he wants soccer teams to run 100m sprints against each other (in a relay or en masse???? (unclear)) in order to break a tie.

Or maybe what he means by “the purest way of solving a tie” is to reduce the game of soccer to its essential elements (i.e., the attractive players) and give the win to the hottest team.

Obviously it should come down to who can pretend to fall down and act injured most convincingly.